Objects In The Rear View Mirror

I would like to take this moment to address an issue that has plagued me since it first came to my attention way back in '94 when I was a confused little boy entering the 5th grade and Meat Loaf was hot. No, not meatloaf as in, "meat loaf for dinner again." I am referring to the other Meat Loaf, you know, the one who played Bob in the Hollywood thriller, Fight Club. Five years before he donned the "bitch-tits" costume, Meat Loaf was hot on the charts with his single, Objects In The Rear View Mirror May Appear Closer Than They Are. The reference to the warning on a rear view mirror is a poignant metaphor about how memories from long ago still haunt us in the present.
All too true I'm afraid, but I myself have always been haunted by the fact that the title of the song is in blatant contradiction to the actual warning on a rear view mirror.

Objects In Mirror Are Closer Than They Appear.

Meat Loaf would have you believe that objects appear close when they are, in fact, far. The man clearly does not understand the principles of a convex mirror and could have taken a lesson from this scene in the 1993 Hollywood thriller Jurassic Park, which clearly points out the fact that, though the T-Rex appears close, it is in fact, closer. Oh Shit, Look Out Malcolm!!! Think they'll have that on the tour? Yes.... apparently, yes.

"Walking" -Ryan Larkin (1968)